J o u r n a l of Religion and Health, Vol. 18, No. 4, 1979
Suffering and Faith Raymond Schmitt It is hypothesized that, u n d e r the impact of suffering or loss, some C h r i s t i a n s not only grieve for what has been lost but also experience feelings of separation from t h e i r God and m o u r n t h a t loss also. This "spiritual mourning" may take different forms and may lead to different outcomes in ways more or less analogous to those described for m o u r n i n g and v a r i a n t s thereof by various workers. Drawing upon such work, the author describes certain possible forms of"spiritual mourning."
ABSTRACT:
Introduction Suffering m a y have a profound impact upon one's religious views. In m a n y instances an individual may hold even more firmly to his religious views. However, in some instances he m a y relinquish them. The Christian need not agree with Sigmund Freud t h a t God is a projection and personalization of the wish for an omnipotent father-figure 1 to realize t h a t m a n y do conceptualize God as such. Christ Himself referred to the F a t h e r in heaven, and Christian beliefs refer to God the F a t h e r in the Trinity. Given this religious view, w h a t are the possible repercussions when a believer experiences loss and suffering? From everyday observation it would seem t h a t there are several possibilities. Some Christians appear in the face of suffering or loss not only to retain their faith but to be comforted by it. Others seem discomforted by it or with it, though retaining it. Still others appear to give it up. And there are those who lose faith but at some later time regain it. Psychological mechanisms enter into determining the outcome--how one deals with the grace of God. For purposes of this paper, a distinction will be made between belief and faith. The word belief will be used to indicate belief in the existence of God; in this case, the omnipotent, all-loving F a t h e r God of Christianity. Faith involves not just belief but also the implication of a t r u s t i n g a t t a c h m e n t to God. A simple analogy might help to explain this. A person who enters into a contract with another only to see the contract broken retains belief in the existence of the other but m a y well lose faith in him. Using the terms thus, it would seem Raymond Schmitt, M.D., is an Assistant Professor in the Division of Child Psychiatry, Department of Psychiatry, North Carolina Memorial Hospital, University of North Carolina School of Medicine; he is also Section Head of the Child Psychiatry Section of the Division for Disorders of Development and Learning of the Biological Sciences Research Center, Division of Health Affairs, University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, North Carolina. The preparation of this paper was supported in part by Grant HD-03110 from the National Institute of Child Health and H u m a n Development and by Maternal and Child Health Training Grant No. M C T = 0 0 0 9 1 6 A . 0022-4197/79/1000-0263500.95
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t h a t under the impact of loss and suffering m a n y Christians retain belief in God, but a number are shaken in their faith in Him. What does it mean to have a t r u s t i n g attachment to the Christian God? This often means t h a t the believer perceives himself as having certain needs t h a t he confidently hopes or even expects God to provide for. Trust is usually based either on the past performance of the one trusted or on a contract or a "covenant" t h a t something will be provided by one party if the other party also fulfills certain agreements. What are the needs for which most Christians perceive themselves to be dependent on GOd? These seem to vary to some extent from believer to believer, but they may be grouped into two large categories. Many (consciously or unconsciously) trust GOd to meet their temporal needs (and some perhaps also their wishes). Christ Himself t a u g h t his followers to ask their ~daily bread" of the F a t h e r in heaven. Many trust God to grant them happiness with Him throughout eternity. M a n y Christians trust God to meet both these groups of needs. Thus, the faith of m a n y Christians would seem to involve a professed belief in a loving Father-God (as one Person of a Trinity) who, they trust, will provide for them here on earth and in an afterlife. How can we examine the m a n n e r in which suffering and loss may have an impact upon this faith from a psychological standpoint? Mention trust and one might think of the work o f E r i k Erikson, who suggests t h a t religion is a means for helping m a n to achieve or retain a sense of existential trust. 2 We are also aware t h a t trust, in h u m a n terms, often develops within the context of an '~attachment" process. One might, therefore, speculate t h a t religious faith occurs as part of an attachment process between believer and the GOd in whom he believes. By the same token, if a believer can attach to an idea of God, he might also detach. For some understanding of the processes of attachment and detachment, we might t u r n to the work of J o h n Bowlby, who studied how the attachment of a child to a parent takes place, and how separation from the parent may set in motion certain mourning processes. 3 It is my belief t h a t the impact of loss and suffering on the faith of m a n y Christians m a y result in a feeling of separation from God and m a y also result in one or another form of mourning of that separation. Several points should be noted in this regard. Although GOd is often viewed by believers as a parent figure, the adult believer is not a child. Nonetheless, his relationship with God is often in some ways similar to a parent/child relationship. Christ Himself advised believers to become as children. 4 Bowlby suggests, too, t h a t what happens to some children when they are separated from their mothers may be similar in ways to the responses of m a n y adults on losing a loved one. 5 A number of writers do not totally agree with Bowlby. Nevertheless, certain processes described by Bowlby m a y be akin to those t h a t occur when suffering leads a believer to experience some doubting of his faith in GOd. Although Bowlby drew to some extent on the work of others (e.g., Robertson, 6 Lind e m a n n 7) his formulations do provide an interesting model from which to
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approach the problem of the impact of suffering and loss upon the faith of many Christians, though not necessarily all. When one experiences a loss, mourning usually takes place with regard to that loss itself. What I am suggesting here is that some Christian believers, in addition, enter into a psychological process that involves feelings of separation from God, which then sets into motion a mourning of that separation or loss. As with mourning for other losses, this spiritual mourning m a y take different forms and lead to different outcomes. What is meant by saying that under the impact of loss or suffering the believer is apt to experience a feeling of separation from God? An outstanding example of one feeling of separation might illustrate this. I refer to the words of Christ as He hung in agony upon the cross: "My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? ''8 Many people would probably say that they too have experienced such feelings.
A brief review of Bowlby's work on separation and mourning Before examining the impact of loss and suffering on faith, it would seem appropriate to present briefly some of Bowlby's work, which will (with some modification) have application to this discussion. Bowlby was concerned with what may happen when a young child (e.g., in the second half of the first year of life to about four years or more of age) experiences a separation from its mother or mothering figure. Much of his work had to do with children admitted to hospitals at a time when mothers were not permitted to stay. The separation from the mother and the strange surroundings appeared to cause a number of these children to experience the onset of a process that Bowlby felt could be subdivided into three phases. 9 Whether a child eventually went through all phases depended upon a number of variables, including the length of time the separation lasted. It is important to note that not all children reacted in the way described. When they did, the first phase of the process set into motion by the separation was one that Bowlby called the ~'protest" phase. In this phase the child yearns and hopes for the return of his mother. He is also angry about the situation. Bowlby noted that a separated child m a y experience anger at the mother, at himself, and/or at his temporary caretakers, e.g., nurses. Although the anger is often generalized, the mother herself, by the fact of the separation from the child, frequently draws the anger, l~ The child is frustrated at not having his needs met by his mother, to whom he has made attachments. Bowlby felt that such anger has a certain utilitarian function, or at least did in a number of situations under which mankind might have lived for long periods of existence. He felt that such anger is often an accompaniment of the efforts t0 regain, or reunite with, the separated individual. 1~ The feeling of anger might goad or spur along the efforts of a separated child to overcome obstacles to find its mother. Of course, under certain conditions such as death of the mother,
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such anger might become problematic if it persists. Bowlby also noted that once a separated mother returns to the child, the child often expresses anger toward her. He felt this may constitute an effort to keep her from straying away again. If after a period of time a separated child is not sufficiently reunited with its mother (or a substitute caretaker), the phase of ~protest" may gradually fade out and blend into the next phase, which is that of"despair." Actually, phases m a y oscillate, according to Bowlby, and in reality are often not so clear-cut as the vicissitudes of writing about them tend to make them appear. Nonetheless, the behavior of the child during the phase of "despair" indicates that a different situation obtains than that during the phase of ~protest." Several features characterize the phase of "despair." One is that the child becomes apathetic. Another is that those behavior patterns which had been organized toward the mother (as their object) now show a breakdown or disorganization, since the goal that facilitated their structure and direction in the first place is now gone. Since they are no longer reinforced, they become extinguished. If the child in the phase ofr '' is still not sufficiently reunited with his mother, he m a y pass on into the phase of "detachment" from her. In this phase he appears to regain some of his interests in his surroundings. He seems to become interested in relationships with others. His mood appears to brighten. If his mother should visit him, he may turn away from her and seem not to care about her. There seems no longer to be the attachment to her that once there was. However, in many instances if the child in this state is sufficiently reunited with its mother, and she provides him with attention and affection, he often w a r m s up to her and reestablishes good relations with her, though not infrequently without first displaying anger toward her for having left him earlier. Apparent detachment may have covered underlying protest. Sometimes, of course, a child in separation is not reunited with its mother; for example, the separation is a consequence of her death. Detachment from that relationship and reattachment to others then become matters of great importance. Many workers feel that most, if not all children, do not proceed through the mourning process without problems, and often experience longlasting consequences of such problems. Bowlby describes certain problematic variants of mourning which are important to the point of this paper. In so doing he draws heavily upon the writings of others, such as Lindemann. Lindemann's work was mainly with adults, but Bowlby suggests certain similarities between adults and children with respect to variants of mourning, just as he does with respect to the more or less normal processes. There are four "main variants of pathological response that are shown by bereaved adults" that Bowlby considers in some detail. 12 In one of these a major feature is ~'a persistent and unconscious yearning" for recovery of the lost loved one. In this variant of mourning the yearning is unconscious rather than experienced consciously as would be the case during the '~protest" phase of a more normal mourning process. The fact that it is unconscious tends to imply that defense mechanisms have come into play. An important element of the normal "protest" phase has been driven out of aware-
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hess. As such, it m a y henceforth manifest itself not in open, direct, and easily recognizable ways but rather in displaced forms of expression over which the individual may exercise less t h a n desired control. Presumably a reason for defense mechanisms entering in and rendering this element of the ~protest" unconscious is t h a t the conscious experiencing of the pain of y e a r n i n g for the lost loved one was too much for the individual in question to bear at the time. However, in the shunting of the process from conscious to unconscious modes of experience, he may lose the advantage of being able to get on and over with the event as it actually is. Instead, as long as the real y e a r n i n g is unconscious, he m a y have to contend with situations of disguised y e a r n i n g for w h a t was lost. The second variant involves "intense and persistent anger and reproach," which may be expressed toward various and sundry individuals, including the mourner himself. In this case, r a t h e r t h a n it being the y e a r n i n g t h a t is defended against and rendered out of consciousness, it is the angry component of the ~protest." The unconscious angry reproaches m a y be then displaced from their real object onto others or onto oneself. As noted, Bowlby feels t h a t a usual source of the anger following a loss is t h a t it is an accompaniment of the attempt to recover the lost loved one. However, the issue of the cause of the anger toward the lost loved one, and whether the anger is functional or not, 13 is one that also brings up matters of whether there was a prior "good" relationship with the lost loved one, or a prior ambivalent relationship with the lost loved one. Also, perhaps the more one feels separation is due to being abandoned by another, the more might anger be experienced toward t h a t other. If, however, one blames himself for the separation, he m a y then be a n g r y at himself. Some people seem to blame circumstances r a t h e r t h a n persons. The third variant of mourning often mentioned is one in which the bereaved does not seem to sorrow so much for his own loss as he does for the losses of others. There develops concern with ~'care of vicarious figures." The individual in a sense has defended against the pain of his own loss by a "projective identification''14 with others who are suffering. Perhaps to some extent this mechanism operates, consciously or unconsciously, on the part of some in the caring and helping professions. It m a y have r a t h e r useful consequences. However, if too heavy and out of conscious awareness, it may assume a dysfunctional character at times, e.g., compulsive oversolicitousness. A fourth variant is one involving "denial" t h a t the loved one is " p e r m a n e n t l y lost?' For purposes of this paper, this variant seems less important t h a n the others.
Application to issues of faith When a Christian experiences suffering or loss of great m e a n i n g to him, he may (in some instances) experience this also as a separation from God, m a r k e d by conscious or unconscious feelings t h a t God has abandoned him. As a result, processes of mourning may be set into motion, with the believer as the bereaved and God as the absent dependency figure. It is important to keep in
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mind that this might occur in addition to whatever mourning the individual does for his actual loss. This spiritual morning occurs because the trusting attachment of the believer to God is interfered with by the events of suffering and loss. The spiritual mourning process that ensues may take any one of a number of possible courses, just as there are variants of mourning described for the usual situations of life in which a loss has occurred. It will be obvious that the possible forms of spiritual mourning to be described here are analogous in some ways to the forms of mourning already presented.
Predominantly conscious spiritual mourning The first of the spiritual mourning processes to be described is one that takes place in a predominantly conscious manner. Upon experiencing significant suffering, this believer feels that God has abandoned him. Such a feeling is probably associated with the view that an omnipotent God has the power to give, take, or prevent loss; and that God is the last possible appeal for need satisfaction. As a result of this seeming abandonment, this individual then enters into a phase analogous to t h a t of ~protest." In this particular form of spiritual mourning, the elements of ~'protest" are experienced consciously. The individual who consciously protests spiritually is usually one who prior to the loss was not overly fearful or angry in his attachment to God. This individual experiences his yearning for God openly. What anger there is over the seeming abandonment is also consciously experienced. There is little repression or displacement of either the yearning or the anger. A classic example of this type of spiritual protest appears to be described in the Book of Job. Job protested openly and directly (with yearning and with anger) h i s apparent abandonment by God. The biblical account seems to indicate that God knew that Job loved him and that Job's trust was based on love. In t h e story the devil did not realize this. The devil bet that if God allowed Job to suffer, Job would have nothing more to fear, and that then considerable anger, which often accompanies great fear, would burst loose and Job would give up his attachment to God. The devil misread Job. Job became angry, but it does not seem to have been a crippling anger in terms of its effects. In its origin, it seems to have been an anger that arose when a valued attachment to a loved one seemed threatened. J o b did not want the attachment to end. He wanted it to hold. Job also did not quite accept the theory of the three friends who told him that he was being punished by God for his sins, a theory that God Himself seems to have rejected when He later reappeared in t h e story. Over and over Job called for God to come back. He called out as the child who is separated from its mother angrily calls out: ~'Why are you leaving me? Come back. Don't you know I love you?" And God came back, which is what Job's protest was really about. When God came back, he informed the three friends that He accepted Job. He informed J o b that J o b would have to accept Him the w a y He is, even though Job might not grasp His might and mystery. In other
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words, Job would have to take God on faith. When Job realized this and realized that he could not dictate to God, the protest ended. Job's faith had been threatened but was not lost. Job possibly had at times moved into the phase of ~despair," which follows that of '~protest." At times his anger m a y have been an '~anger of despair ''15 more than an anger of'r But Job did not go on through "despair" to a phase of ~'detachment" from God. There are Christians, however, who under the impact of suffering or loss go through a stage of spiritual despair and consciously detach from their previous concept of God. Some of these people may then go on to place much of their former faith in other things consciously, e.g., a political party. In detaching from one's faith in God, consciously or unconsciously, there is probably a danger of giving to finite things a totality of faith suitable only if a mysterious transcendency is the object. One can, of course, have faith in God and a faith in one's political party too, but they should be different faiths. How do some believers under the impact of suffering go on to despair of God consciously, and some go on to detach from Him consciously? Different variables may be involved from one instance to another. In one instance an individual might mourn his lost image of a Person-God and detach from that image. In another instance it may be that the individual has experienced so many losses, or so much suffering, for so long, with so few good things happening, that he just cannot (perhaps given his own reluctance) hang on to the idea of a loving God. Several other points should be stressed with regard to this conscious form of spiritual mourning. At any point in the process, that is, during protest, or despair, or detachment, or even after attachment to something other than God has taken place (if matters go that far), faith in God may nevertheless be restored. Job's religious faith seemed revitalized during the phase of protest. It is also important that although a person m a y not have faith (or m a y lose faith) in God as God is conceptualized by Christians, he may nonetheless have (or come to) a profound faith in another concept of an ultimate God.
Spiritual mourning involving unconscious yearning In this type of spiritual mourning, as in the others, the loss or suffering triggers the feeling on the part of the believer that God is abandoning him. He m a y feel some anger consciously and m a y even express anger openly toward God for the seeming abandonment. However, this individual represses or otherwise defends against the painful feelings of loss by rendering unconscious his yearning for reunion with God. Presumably, he does this without being aware of so doing. This person is still in a phase of protest, a protest in which the continued yearning for God has become repressed (or otherwise defended against) and unconscious. This individual m a y say, "If there were a loving God, we wouldn't suffer," and with an angry tone. (The individual who has already reached "detachment" is more likely to say such things in an even tone.)
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The individual undergoing this type of spiritual mourning m a y say and believe that he no longer has faith in God, but his yearning for God remains and m a y take disguised forms. It is this type of individual, rather than the one who has consciously detached from God, who is more likely to take a faith that had God as its object and place that faith in some finite thing, which then becomes a god to him.
Spiritual mourning involving unconscious anger This type of spiritual mourning is in some ways the analogue of that variant of mourning for an absent loved one in which unconscious anger toward the lost loved one plays a significant role. In this form of spiritual mourning, as in the others, significant loss or suffering is experienced as a separation. In this case, the feeling of separation may or may not be experienced unconsciously. In some cases there may be repression of such feelings. The individual may feel he has strong belief and/or faith in God, consciously believing this to be the case, but at the same time repressing or otherwise making unconscious a sense that he has experienced a separation or abandonment. However, what mainly characterizes this type of spiritual mourning is that the individual experiences the angry component of his protest phase in a m a n n e r that is largely unconscious. Presumably he is upset by the angry feelings to the extent that they are pushed out of awareness. He m a y feel a great sense of yearning for closeness with God, but his anger over the separation is not experienced consciously. This individual's unconscious anger or reproach might be displaced onto others or onto himself (or both), without his being aware that this is happening. If such anger is displaced onto the self, it may be felt as guilt. There are, of course, other sources of guilt. An individual who has consciously done a wrong, and is consciously aware of so doing, may feel an appropriate guilt. Such guilt should lead him to attempt reparation, if possible, toward the party he has wronged. The Christian who is aware of wrongdoing m a y feel upon experiencing misfortune that God is punishing him for his sins. If such a person sees God also as a loving GOd who forgives sins and meets needs here and/or in the hereafter, he will probably not experience much anger toward GOd. It is when an individual's ambivalence toward God is, or becomes, largely unconscious that this type of spiritual mourning is apt to occur. The individual experiencing this type of spiritual mourning turns his anger at God into unconscious channels wherein it is often displaced onto himself in the form of guilt. Ostensibly, he feels guilty because by his sins he has offended God, and he m a y feel consciously that God has retaliated by punishing him through loss or suffering. Such conscious thoughts m a y be involved in this individual's guilt; but in this case they are only a part, and not the most important part. If it were only that, he could express his sorrow to God for his actual sins and probably experience some lifting of the sense of guilt.
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But t h a t is not all there is to it in the guilt of this type of spiritual mourning. In addition to his actual sins, for which he may well feel conscious guilt, there seems for this person a far greater sin, which is held out of awareness. This sin for him is his anger toward God. For him this m a y be such a horrible t h i n g t h a t he cannot experience it consciously and cannot consciously own up to it. It is buried; he displaces his anger onto himself; he experiences guilt. And in one sense he is correct in feeling guilt by his standards, for if one considers it a sin to feel abandoned by God, and to be angry over that, then there would be guilt accruing to t h a t sin. This person, however, is not consciously aware of this sin of his. He may attribute his guilt to other events, which may or m a y not deserve guilt in their own right, but he remains unaware of the event for which his guilt is mainly felt. Christ did not set an example of denying a feeling of being abandoned. Like Job, He cried out for explanation, ~My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? ''is Yet some do experience suffering as abandonment by GOd and find it difficult to admit consciously a feeling of abandonment or a sense of protest, at least initially. If such feelings are too much for an individual to accept, he is likely to repress them. Some individuals m a y do this because they have been t a u g h t considerable fear of a punishing GOd and either it has been an emphatic teaching or they are particularly sensitive to it for one or another reason. Different individuals may for various reasons experience considerable anger toward God. Bowlby noted t h a t some children can become so angry at a parent t h a t the attachment between them m a y become weaker. 17 He felt t h a t such r anger probably occurs most often in the cases of those children who have experienced a number of separations, and also when threats of abandonment have been frequently made. Such threats in the spiritual realm m a y be in the form of religious views t h a t hold GOd to be quite demanding and punishing with little forgiveness in His makeup. A church need not necessarily teach this to an individual. Some people come to this view through other mechanisms. In any case, some individuals may not be able to resolve or tolerate any additional conscious anger toward God, however much or however little they already feel. Then, if anger occurs over an apparent spiritual abandonment, repression of angry feelings toward God may occur. Then also the ~sin" goes unconfessed to God and guilt may prevail, with little chance of being lifted, since it is attached to a sin t h a t is outside the range of confession and knowing remorse. There seems to be little point to such repression anyway, if one believes t h a t God is all-knowing. However, such individuals cannot help using these defense mechanisms. Certain individuals seem to experience unconscious fear of God and unconscious anger toward God even before the loss occurs which sets off the episode of spiritual mourning of the type being discussed. I n some of these situations, though not all, the unconscious fear of God and unconscious anger toward GOd may represent a displacement of an individual's anger toward a n a t u r a l parent, for example, his father. Such a person may as a child have had great fear of
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his own father, either because the father was quite demanding and/or punishing or because he was overly sensitive to the reprimands of a father who in actuality was not overly demanding or punitive. In either case, the child m a y have repressed his fear of his father along with the anger t h a t would usually accompany such fear, and then have displaced such fear and anger onto other authority figures and/or God as a super-authority figure. It need not have been fear and anger toward one's father that is displaced onto God; it could be fear and anger toward one's mother that is so displaced. Either or both parents might have been the original objects of the fear that is now displaced onto God. If a child is being raised in a home or culture in which there is much legalistic and strict religious training with relatively little emphasis on God's love, such a child may in some instances displace repressed fearful and angry feelings related to his natural parent onto his Heavenly Father. In some cases this is done unconsciously, possibly in part because the child is being taught that the legalistic, strict Heavenly Father is quick to deliver everlasting ~'massive retaliation" for sins, which this individual m a y deem his feelings of anger to be. At this point we have an individual who is unconsciously fearful and angry toward God (upon whom he has displaced fear of and anger toward a parent), and probably upon whom he has projected frightening characteristics that he, correctly or incorrectly, attributed to his natural parent. He may view God as much more demanding and punitive than his own religion presents God as being. If his religion does present God as being very demanding and punitive, that may reinforce his views. If it does not, he may modify his views somewhat but still may cling to them in the face of his church's teaching basically of a loving, forgiving God. If this individual goes into adult life full of unconscious fear and anger toward God (albeit much of it displaced from a natural parent), and viewing God as more demanding and punishing (albeit much of this projected) than giving and forgiving, then he is a set-up for this type of spiritual mourning when misfortunes strike him. The dynamics I have been describing and relating to religious beliefs is drawn from the body of knowledge of psychoanalytic theory. Such dynamics seems to influence a number of descriptions of this type of spiritual mourning, though the originators of such concepts might or might not agree with so mixing or applying them. In any case, such a person as I have described in this type of spiritual mourning is often burdened by a profound sense of guilt. He seems unable to feel that God will (or perhaps even can) alleviate his guilt through God's love and forgiveness. Such an individual m a y not feel he is ever really forgiven, even though he confesses his sins and does penance for them. Not infrequently this is because he is not conscious of what may be his "sin," his unconscious anger toward God. He may erect scrupulous standards for himself. Often that worsens matters for him because he tends to experience these as more demands that a harsh God is making upon him, demands he feels he cannot meet and which, therefore, may increase his guilt and his anger. This is not to say that
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all persons who erect high moral standards for themselves do so on this basis. Many do so on the basis of a deep love for God, as an athlete who loves a sport might exact more and more demands upon himself in training so that he m a y serve and enjoy his sport all the more. But such people do so with genuine z e s t and joy. They are swept along by love and initiative, not driven by anger and fear. The person I am speaking of finds little joy in what he is doing. He is driven, and often morose and gloomy in his efforts. However, it is possible such individuals also may return to a closeness with God. In so doing, they usually experience changes in their self-images and in their image of God also.
Spiritual mourning involving ~'care of vicarious figures" In this form of spiritual mourning there is a denial or repression of one's own grief over loss. One projects onto others what he is feeling for himself, and then cares for them, perceiving them as suffering and wronged individuals. Of course they often are, and this individual may do much good for those others with whom he unconsciously identifies. Again, not everyone who actively cares for others is necessarily operating under the influence of such an unconscious mechanism. If the caring for others is based too much on an unconscious vicarious mechanism, there may be problems if one feels one's own needs are unmet, and the resulting anger may spoil the "milk of h u m a n kindness." In transposing this to the spiritual mourning sphere, there appear to be two possible analogies. One is that the individual who feels abandoned by God m a y project his own grief onto those he perceives (often correctly) as the materially abandoned, i.e., the poor, the underfed. The other possibility is that he m a y project his grief onto those he perceives, correctly or incorrectly, as the spiritually lost. The "spiritually lost" might to him be those of other religions, or no religion, whom he feels he must convert. Once again, this is not to say that all who go out to convert others are operating on this mechanism; nor is this to pass judgment on those who attempt to convert others on the basis of this mechanism. But there are some people who are likely to attempt to convert others to their own religion on this basis. A possible result is that they m a y not simply try to convert others but attempt to dragoon them to the "true" religion.
Spiritual mourning involving denial that God is lost This form of spiritual mourning cannot be based completely on analogy to that form of mourning in which the loved one is permanently lost, e.g., by death. Given that, we can note that there are forms of spiritual mourning in which there is denial of a sense of abandonment by God following a significant loss or significant suffering. A possible form of this has already been discussed. It is important to note that in such forms of spiritual mourning the individual
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consciously believes that he does not feel a sense of abandoment, and this is based on unconscious defense against the feelings that would accompany a sense that God has temporarily abandoned him. (This is one distinguishing aspect between this form of spiritual mourning and the reaction to loss and suffering to be described next.) In the forms of spiritual mourning involving defensive denial of a sense of abandonment, the individual might continue on in his belief in God consciously; but any one of a number of displacements of the yearning and anger of unconscious protest (or perhaps the apathy and disorganization of despair) m a y take place.
Persistence of faith unshaken by loss and suffering This last situation to be described is one in which I feel spiritual mourning does not occur in response to earthly loss and suffering. In this situation there is little if any shaking of faith or of the trusting attachment of the believer to his God, even though the loss or suffering might be severe. This is because in this situation the believer does not experience to any significant degree a sense of separation from God or abandonment by God when he experiences the earthly loss or suffering. This m a y be due to certain beliefs on his part. The last words of Christ as stated in Luke seem to be the watchwords of some believers who experience no feeling of abandonment by God under the impact of suffering: ~Father into Thy hands I commit my spirit. ''18 This does not mean that one cannot try to change temporal affairs for the better by his own efforts; but if one cannot change matters, such people seem to accept what is and to abandon themselves to trust in God. A child usually develops trust on the basis of experiencing over and over that his mother lovingly meets his needs, and possibly also by experiencing that even though she goes away briefly she returns to meet his needs. 19 Those believers who have this kind of faith in God are likely to experience a rather constant trusting attachment to God. Other factors can tend to weaken the effect of this learning. The way one interprets his needs and interprets events influencing his needs is also important; and some who feel quite strongly that their God should provide them earthly happiness may have at times some difficulties with constancy of faith. Nevertheless, even though one or another of these various situations may exist, a strong faith in God might perhaps be developed. Ultimately, however, faith in God does require a sense of acceptance and trust in the mystery that is GOd.
References 1. Freud, S., '~The Future of an Illusion," In The Standard Edition of the Complete Psychological Works of Sigmund Freud, vol. 21, London, Hogarth Press, 1961, pp. 5-56. 2. Erikson, E., Childhood and Society, 2nd ed. New York, W.W. Norton & Co., 1963, p. 250. 3. Bowlby, J., '~Separation Anxiety," Int. J. of Psychoanalysis, 1960, 41, 89-113; ~Grief and
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4. 5. 6. 7.
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Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 1960, 15, 9-52; ~Processes of Mourning," Int. J. of Psychoanalysis, 1961, 42,317-340; "Pathological Mourning and Childhood Mourning," J. Am. Psychoanalytic Assoc., 1963, 11,500-541; Attachment and Loss, vols. 1 and 2. New York, Basic Books, 1973 (By the Tavistock Institute of Human Relations). Matthew 6:11 (RSV). Bowlby, J., '~Grief and Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," op. cit., p. 21. Rebertson, J., Film: ~'A Two Year Old Goes to Hospital." London, Tavistock Child Development Research Unit. New York, New York Univ. Film Library, 1953. Lindemann, E., "Symptomatology and Management of Acute Grief," Am. J. Psychiatry, 1944,
101,141-148. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19.
Mark 15:34 (RSV). Bowlby, J., "Separation Anxiety," op. cit., p. 90. __., ~Separation Anxiety," op. cit., p. 90. ., '~Grief and Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," op. cir., p. 23. __., "Processes of Mourning," op. cit., p. 321. ., "Pathological Mourning and Childhood Mourning," op. cit., pp. 246-251. Greene, W.A., "Role of Vicarious Object in the Adaptation to Loss: I. Use of a Vicarious Object as a Means of Adjustment to Separation from a Significant Person," Psychosom. Med., 1958, 20, 344-350. Bowlby, J., Attachment and Lossl vol. 2, Separation, op. cit., p. 246. Mark 15:34 (RSV). Bowlby, J., Attachment and Loss, vol. 2, Separation, op. cit., p. 248. Luke 23:46 (RSV). Mahler, M., "Thoughts about Development and Individuation," Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 1963, 18,307-324.
Suffering and Faith Raymond Schmitt It is hypothesized that, u n d e r the impact of suffering or loss, some C h r i s t i a n s not only grieve for what has been lost but also experience feelings of separation from t h e i r God and m o u r n t h a t loss also. This "spiritual mourning" may take different forms and may lead to different outcomes in ways more or less analogous to those described for m o u r n i n g and v a r i a n t s thereof by various workers. Drawing upon such work, the author describes certain possible forms of"spiritual mourning."
ABSTRACT:
Introduction Suffering m a y have a profound impact upon one's religious views. In m a n y instances an individual may hold even more firmly to his religious views. However, in some instances he m a y relinquish them. The Christian need not agree with Sigmund Freud t h a t God is a projection and personalization of the wish for an omnipotent father-figure 1 to realize t h a t m a n y do conceptualize God as such. Christ Himself referred to the F a t h e r in heaven, and Christian beliefs refer to God the F a t h e r in the Trinity. Given this religious view, w h a t are the possible repercussions when a believer experiences loss and suffering? From everyday observation it would seem t h a t there are several possibilities. Some Christians appear in the face of suffering or loss not only to retain their faith but to be comforted by it. Others seem discomforted by it or with it, though retaining it. Still others appear to give it up. And there are those who lose faith but at some later time regain it. Psychological mechanisms enter into determining the outcome--how one deals with the grace of God. For purposes of this paper, a distinction will be made between belief and faith. The word belief will be used to indicate belief in the existence of God; in this case, the omnipotent, all-loving F a t h e r God of Christianity. Faith involves not just belief but also the implication of a t r u s t i n g a t t a c h m e n t to God. A simple analogy might help to explain this. A person who enters into a contract with another only to see the contract broken retains belief in the existence of the other but m a y well lose faith in him. Using the terms thus, it would seem Raymond Schmitt, M.D., is an Assistant Professor in the Division of Child Psychiatry, Department of Psychiatry, North Carolina Memorial Hospital, University of North Carolina School of Medicine; he is also Section Head of the Child Psychiatry Section of the Division for Disorders of Development and Learning of the Biological Sciences Research Center, Division of Health Affairs, University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, North Carolina. The preparation of this paper was supported in part by Grant HD-03110 from the National Institute of Child Health and H u m a n Development and by Maternal and Child Health Training Grant No. M C T = 0 0 0 9 1 6 A . 0022-4197/79/1000-0263500.95
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t h a t under the impact of loss and suffering m a n y Christians retain belief in God, but a number are shaken in their faith in Him. What does it mean to have a t r u s t i n g attachment to the Christian God? This often means t h a t the believer perceives himself as having certain needs t h a t he confidently hopes or even expects God to provide for. Trust is usually based either on the past performance of the one trusted or on a contract or a "covenant" t h a t something will be provided by one party if the other party also fulfills certain agreements. What are the needs for which most Christians perceive themselves to be dependent on GOd? These seem to vary to some extent from believer to believer, but they may be grouped into two large categories. Many (consciously or unconsciously) trust GOd to meet their temporal needs (and some perhaps also their wishes). Christ Himself t a u g h t his followers to ask their ~daily bread" of the F a t h e r in heaven. Many trust God to grant them happiness with Him throughout eternity. M a n y Christians trust God to meet both these groups of needs. Thus, the faith of m a n y Christians would seem to involve a professed belief in a loving Father-God (as one Person of a Trinity) who, they trust, will provide for them here on earth and in an afterlife. How can we examine the m a n n e r in which suffering and loss may have an impact upon this faith from a psychological standpoint? Mention trust and one might think of the work o f E r i k Erikson, who suggests t h a t religion is a means for helping m a n to achieve or retain a sense of existential trust. 2 We are also aware t h a t trust, in h u m a n terms, often develops within the context of an '~attachment" process. One might, therefore, speculate t h a t religious faith occurs as part of an attachment process between believer and the GOd in whom he believes. By the same token, if a believer can attach to an idea of God, he might also detach. For some understanding of the processes of attachment and detachment, we might t u r n to the work of J o h n Bowlby, who studied how the attachment of a child to a parent takes place, and how separation from the parent may set in motion certain mourning processes. 3 It is my belief t h a t the impact of loss and suffering on the faith of m a n y Christians m a y result in a feeling of separation from God and m a y also result in one or another form of mourning of that separation. Several points should be noted in this regard. Although GOd is often viewed by believers as a parent figure, the adult believer is not a child. Nonetheless, his relationship with God is often in some ways similar to a parent/child relationship. Christ Himself advised believers to become as children. 4 Bowlby suggests, too, t h a t what happens to some children when they are separated from their mothers may be similar in ways to the responses of m a n y adults on losing a loved one. 5 A number of writers do not totally agree with Bowlby. Nevertheless, certain processes described by Bowlby m a y be akin to those t h a t occur when suffering leads a believer to experience some doubting of his faith in GOd. Although Bowlby drew to some extent on the work of others (e.g., Robertson, 6 Lind e m a n n 7) his formulations do provide an interesting model from which to
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approach the problem of the impact of suffering and loss upon the faith of many Christians, though not necessarily all. When one experiences a loss, mourning usually takes place with regard to that loss itself. What I am suggesting here is that some Christian believers, in addition, enter into a psychological process that involves feelings of separation from God, which then sets into motion a mourning of that separation or loss. As with mourning for other losses, this spiritual mourning m a y take different forms and lead to different outcomes. What is meant by saying that under the impact of loss or suffering the believer is apt to experience a feeling of separation from God? An outstanding example of one feeling of separation might illustrate this. I refer to the words of Christ as He hung in agony upon the cross: "My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? ''8 Many people would probably say that they too have experienced such feelings.
A brief review of Bowlby's work on separation and mourning Before examining the impact of loss and suffering on faith, it would seem appropriate to present briefly some of Bowlby's work, which will (with some modification) have application to this discussion. Bowlby was concerned with what may happen when a young child (e.g., in the second half of the first year of life to about four years or more of age) experiences a separation from its mother or mothering figure. Much of his work had to do with children admitted to hospitals at a time when mothers were not permitted to stay. The separation from the mother and the strange surroundings appeared to cause a number of these children to experience the onset of a process that Bowlby felt could be subdivided into three phases. 9 Whether a child eventually went through all phases depended upon a number of variables, including the length of time the separation lasted. It is important to note that not all children reacted in the way described. When they did, the first phase of the process set into motion by the separation was one that Bowlby called the ~'protest" phase. In this phase the child yearns and hopes for the return of his mother. He is also angry about the situation. Bowlby noted that a separated child m a y experience anger at the mother, at himself, and/or at his temporary caretakers, e.g., nurses. Although the anger is often generalized, the mother herself, by the fact of the separation from the child, frequently draws the anger, l~ The child is frustrated at not having his needs met by his mother, to whom he has made attachments. Bowlby felt that such anger has a certain utilitarian function, or at least did in a number of situations under which mankind might have lived for long periods of existence. He felt that such anger is often an accompaniment of the efforts t0 regain, or reunite with, the separated individual. 1~ The feeling of anger might goad or spur along the efforts of a separated child to overcome obstacles to find its mother. Of course, under certain conditions such as death of the mother,
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such anger might become problematic if it persists. Bowlby also noted that once a separated mother returns to the child, the child often expresses anger toward her. He felt this may constitute an effort to keep her from straying away again. If after a period of time a separated child is not sufficiently reunited with its mother (or a substitute caretaker), the phase of ~protest" may gradually fade out and blend into the next phase, which is that of"despair." Actually, phases m a y oscillate, according to Bowlby, and in reality are often not so clear-cut as the vicissitudes of writing about them tend to make them appear. Nonetheless, the behavior of the child during the phase of "despair" indicates that a different situation obtains than that during the phase of ~protest." Several features characterize the phase of "despair." One is that the child becomes apathetic. Another is that those behavior patterns which had been organized toward the mother (as their object) now show a breakdown or disorganization, since the goal that facilitated their structure and direction in the first place is now gone. Since they are no longer reinforced, they become extinguished. If the child in the phase ofr '' is still not sufficiently reunited with his mother, he m a y pass on into the phase of "detachment" from her. In this phase he appears to regain some of his interests in his surroundings. He seems to become interested in relationships with others. His mood appears to brighten. If his mother should visit him, he may turn away from her and seem not to care about her. There seems no longer to be the attachment to her that once there was. However, in many instances if the child in this state is sufficiently reunited with its mother, and she provides him with attention and affection, he often w a r m s up to her and reestablishes good relations with her, though not infrequently without first displaying anger toward her for having left him earlier. Apparent detachment may have covered underlying protest. Sometimes, of course, a child in separation is not reunited with its mother; for example, the separation is a consequence of her death. Detachment from that relationship and reattachment to others then become matters of great importance. Many workers feel that most, if not all children, do not proceed through the mourning process without problems, and often experience longlasting consequences of such problems. Bowlby describes certain problematic variants of mourning which are important to the point of this paper. In so doing he draws heavily upon the writings of others, such as Lindemann. Lindemann's work was mainly with adults, but Bowlby suggests certain similarities between adults and children with respect to variants of mourning, just as he does with respect to the more or less normal processes. There are four "main variants of pathological response that are shown by bereaved adults" that Bowlby considers in some detail. 12 In one of these a major feature is ~'a persistent and unconscious yearning" for recovery of the lost loved one. In this variant of mourning the yearning is unconscious rather than experienced consciously as would be the case during the '~protest" phase of a more normal mourning process. The fact that it is unconscious tends to imply that defense mechanisms have come into play. An important element of the normal "protest" phase has been driven out of aware-
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hess. As such, it m a y henceforth manifest itself not in open, direct, and easily recognizable ways but rather in displaced forms of expression over which the individual may exercise less t h a n desired control. Presumably a reason for defense mechanisms entering in and rendering this element of the ~protest" unconscious is t h a t the conscious experiencing of the pain of y e a r n i n g for the lost loved one was too much for the individual in question to bear at the time. However, in the shunting of the process from conscious to unconscious modes of experience, he may lose the advantage of being able to get on and over with the event as it actually is. Instead, as long as the real y e a r n i n g is unconscious, he m a y have to contend with situations of disguised y e a r n i n g for w h a t was lost. The second variant involves "intense and persistent anger and reproach," which may be expressed toward various and sundry individuals, including the mourner himself. In this case, r a t h e r t h a n it being the y e a r n i n g t h a t is defended against and rendered out of consciousness, it is the angry component of the ~protest." The unconscious angry reproaches m a y be then displaced from their real object onto others or onto oneself. As noted, Bowlby feels t h a t a usual source of the anger following a loss is t h a t it is an accompaniment of the attempt to recover the lost loved one. However, the issue of the cause of the anger toward the lost loved one, and whether the anger is functional or not, 13 is one that also brings up matters of whether there was a prior "good" relationship with the lost loved one, or a prior ambivalent relationship with the lost loved one. Also, perhaps the more one feels separation is due to being abandoned by another, the more might anger be experienced toward t h a t other. If, however, one blames himself for the separation, he m a y then be a n g r y at himself. Some people seem to blame circumstances r a t h e r t h a n persons. The third variant of mourning often mentioned is one in which the bereaved does not seem to sorrow so much for his own loss as he does for the losses of others. There develops concern with ~'care of vicarious figures." The individual in a sense has defended against the pain of his own loss by a "projective identification''14 with others who are suffering. Perhaps to some extent this mechanism operates, consciously or unconsciously, on the part of some in the caring and helping professions. It m a y have r a t h e r useful consequences. However, if too heavy and out of conscious awareness, it may assume a dysfunctional character at times, e.g., compulsive oversolicitousness. A fourth variant is one involving "denial" t h a t the loved one is " p e r m a n e n t l y lost?' For purposes of this paper, this variant seems less important t h a n the others.
Application to issues of faith When a Christian experiences suffering or loss of great m e a n i n g to him, he may (in some instances) experience this also as a separation from God, m a r k e d by conscious or unconscious feelings t h a t God has abandoned him. As a result, processes of mourning may be set into motion, with the believer as the bereaved and God as the absent dependency figure. It is important to keep in
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mind that this might occur in addition to whatever mourning the individual does for his actual loss. This spiritual morning occurs because the trusting attachment of the believer to God is interfered with by the events of suffering and loss. The spiritual mourning process that ensues may take any one of a number of possible courses, just as there are variants of mourning described for the usual situations of life in which a loss has occurred. It will be obvious that the possible forms of spiritual mourning to be described here are analogous in some ways to the forms of mourning already presented.
Predominantly conscious spiritual mourning The first of the spiritual mourning processes to be described is one that takes place in a predominantly conscious manner. Upon experiencing significant suffering, this believer feels that God has abandoned him. Such a feeling is probably associated with the view that an omnipotent God has the power to give, take, or prevent loss; and that God is the last possible appeal for need satisfaction. As a result of this seeming abandonment, this individual then enters into a phase analogous to t h a t of ~protest." In this particular form of spiritual mourning, the elements of ~'protest" are experienced consciously. The individual who consciously protests spiritually is usually one who prior to the loss was not overly fearful or angry in his attachment to God. This individual experiences his yearning for God openly. What anger there is over the seeming abandonment is also consciously experienced. There is little repression or displacement of either the yearning or the anger. A classic example of this type of spiritual protest appears to be described in the Book of Job. Job protested openly and directly (with yearning and with anger) h i s apparent abandonment by God. The biblical account seems to indicate that God knew that Job loved him and that Job's trust was based on love. In t h e story the devil did not realize this. The devil bet that if God allowed Job to suffer, Job would have nothing more to fear, and that then considerable anger, which often accompanies great fear, would burst loose and Job would give up his attachment to God. The devil misread Job. Job became angry, but it does not seem to have been a crippling anger in terms of its effects. In its origin, it seems to have been an anger that arose when a valued attachment to a loved one seemed threatened. J o b did not want the attachment to end. He wanted it to hold. Job also did not quite accept the theory of the three friends who told him that he was being punished by God for his sins, a theory that God Himself seems to have rejected when He later reappeared in t h e story. Over and over Job called for God to come back. He called out as the child who is separated from its mother angrily calls out: ~'Why are you leaving me? Come back. Don't you know I love you?" And God came back, which is what Job's protest was really about. When God came back, he informed the three friends that He accepted Job. He informed J o b that J o b would have to accept Him the w a y He is, even though Job might not grasp His might and mystery. In other
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words, Job would have to take God on faith. When Job realized this and realized that he could not dictate to God, the protest ended. Job's faith had been threatened but was not lost. Job possibly had at times moved into the phase of ~despair," which follows that of '~protest." At times his anger m a y have been an '~anger of despair ''15 more than an anger of'r But Job did not go on through "despair" to a phase of ~'detachment" from God. There are Christians, however, who under the impact of suffering or loss go through a stage of spiritual despair and consciously detach from their previous concept of God. Some of these people may then go on to place much of their former faith in other things consciously, e.g., a political party. In detaching from one's faith in God, consciously or unconsciously, there is probably a danger of giving to finite things a totality of faith suitable only if a mysterious transcendency is the object. One can, of course, have faith in God and a faith in one's political party too, but they should be different faiths. How do some believers under the impact of suffering go on to despair of God consciously, and some go on to detach from Him consciously? Different variables may be involved from one instance to another. In one instance an individual might mourn his lost image of a Person-God and detach from that image. In another instance it may be that the individual has experienced so many losses, or so much suffering, for so long, with so few good things happening, that he just cannot (perhaps given his own reluctance) hang on to the idea of a loving God. Several other points should be stressed with regard to this conscious form of spiritual mourning. At any point in the process, that is, during protest, or despair, or detachment, or even after attachment to something other than God has taken place (if matters go that far), faith in God may nevertheless be restored. Job's religious faith seemed revitalized during the phase of protest. It is also important that although a person m a y not have faith (or m a y lose faith) in God as God is conceptualized by Christians, he may nonetheless have (or come to) a profound faith in another concept of an ultimate God.
Spiritual mourning involving unconscious yearning In this type of spiritual mourning, as in the others, the loss or suffering triggers the feeling on the part of the believer that God is abandoning him. He m a y feel some anger consciously and m a y even express anger openly toward God for the seeming abandonment. However, this individual represses or otherwise defends against the painful feelings of loss by rendering unconscious his yearning for reunion with God. Presumably, he does this without being aware of so doing. This person is still in a phase of protest, a protest in which the continued yearning for God has become repressed (or otherwise defended against) and unconscious. This individual m a y say, "If there were a loving God, we wouldn't suffer," and with an angry tone. (The individual who has already reached "detachment" is more likely to say such things in an even tone.)
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The individual undergoing this type of spiritual mourning m a y say and believe that he no longer has faith in God, but his yearning for God remains and m a y take disguised forms. It is this type of individual, rather than the one who has consciously detached from God, who is more likely to take a faith that had God as its object and place that faith in some finite thing, which then becomes a god to him.
Spiritual mourning involving unconscious anger This type of spiritual mourning is in some ways the analogue of that variant of mourning for an absent loved one in which unconscious anger toward the lost loved one plays a significant role. In this form of spiritual mourning, as in the others, significant loss or suffering is experienced as a separation. In this case, the feeling of separation may or may not be experienced unconsciously. In some cases there may be repression of such feelings. The individual may feel he has strong belief and/or faith in God, consciously believing this to be the case, but at the same time repressing or otherwise making unconscious a sense that he has experienced a separation or abandonment. However, what mainly characterizes this type of spiritual mourning is that the individual experiences the angry component of his protest phase in a m a n n e r that is largely unconscious. Presumably he is upset by the angry feelings to the extent that they are pushed out of awareness. He m a y feel a great sense of yearning for closeness with God, but his anger over the separation is not experienced consciously. This individual's unconscious anger or reproach might be displaced onto others or onto himself (or both), without his being aware that this is happening. If such anger is displaced onto the self, it may be felt as guilt. There are, of course, other sources of guilt. An individual who has consciously done a wrong, and is consciously aware of so doing, may feel an appropriate guilt. Such guilt should lead him to attempt reparation, if possible, toward the party he has wronged. The Christian who is aware of wrongdoing m a y feel upon experiencing misfortune that God is punishing him for his sins. If such a person sees God also as a loving GOd who forgives sins and meets needs here and/or in the hereafter, he will probably not experience much anger toward GOd. It is when an individual's ambivalence toward God is, or becomes, largely unconscious that this type of spiritual mourning is apt to occur. The individual experiencing this type of spiritual mourning turns his anger at God into unconscious channels wherein it is often displaced onto himself in the form of guilt. Ostensibly, he feels guilty because by his sins he has offended God, and he m a y feel consciously that God has retaliated by punishing him through loss or suffering. Such conscious thoughts m a y be involved in this individual's guilt; but in this case they are only a part, and not the most important part. If it were only that, he could express his sorrow to God for his actual sins and probably experience some lifting of the sense of guilt.
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But t h a t is not all there is to it in the guilt of this type of spiritual mourning. In addition to his actual sins, for which he may well feel conscious guilt, there seems for this person a far greater sin, which is held out of awareness. This sin for him is his anger toward God. For him this m a y be such a horrible t h i n g t h a t he cannot experience it consciously and cannot consciously own up to it. It is buried; he displaces his anger onto himself; he experiences guilt. And in one sense he is correct in feeling guilt by his standards, for if one considers it a sin to feel abandoned by God, and to be angry over that, then there would be guilt accruing to t h a t sin. This person, however, is not consciously aware of this sin of his. He may attribute his guilt to other events, which may or m a y not deserve guilt in their own right, but he remains unaware of the event for which his guilt is mainly felt. Christ did not set an example of denying a feeling of being abandoned. Like Job, He cried out for explanation, ~My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? ''is Yet some do experience suffering as abandonment by GOd and find it difficult to admit consciously a feeling of abandonment or a sense of protest, at least initially. If such feelings are too much for an individual to accept, he is likely to repress them. Some individuals m a y do this because they have been t a u g h t considerable fear of a punishing GOd and either it has been an emphatic teaching or they are particularly sensitive to it for one or another reason. Different individuals may for various reasons experience considerable anger toward God. Bowlby noted t h a t some children can become so angry at a parent t h a t the attachment between them m a y become weaker. 17 He felt t h a t such r anger probably occurs most often in the cases of those children who have experienced a number of separations, and also when threats of abandonment have been frequently made. Such threats in the spiritual realm m a y be in the form of religious views t h a t hold GOd to be quite demanding and punishing with little forgiveness in His makeup. A church need not necessarily teach this to an individual. Some people come to this view through other mechanisms. In any case, some individuals may not be able to resolve or tolerate any additional conscious anger toward God, however much or however little they already feel. Then, if anger occurs over an apparent spiritual abandonment, repression of angry feelings toward God may occur. Then also the ~sin" goes unconfessed to God and guilt may prevail, with little chance of being lifted, since it is attached to a sin t h a t is outside the range of confession and knowing remorse. There seems to be little point to such repression anyway, if one believes t h a t God is all-knowing. However, such individuals cannot help using these defense mechanisms. Certain individuals seem to experience unconscious fear of God and unconscious anger toward God even before the loss occurs which sets off the episode of spiritual mourning of the type being discussed. I n some of these situations, though not all, the unconscious fear of God and unconscious anger toward GOd may represent a displacement of an individual's anger toward a n a t u r a l parent, for example, his father. Such a person may as a child have had great fear of
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his own father, either because the father was quite demanding and/or punishing or because he was overly sensitive to the reprimands of a father who in actuality was not overly demanding or punitive. In either case, the child m a y have repressed his fear of his father along with the anger t h a t would usually accompany such fear, and then have displaced such fear and anger onto other authority figures and/or God as a super-authority figure. It need not have been fear and anger toward one's father that is displaced onto God; it could be fear and anger toward one's mother that is so displaced. Either or both parents might have been the original objects of the fear that is now displaced onto God. If a child is being raised in a home or culture in which there is much legalistic and strict religious training with relatively little emphasis on God's love, such a child may in some instances displace repressed fearful and angry feelings related to his natural parent onto his Heavenly Father. In some cases this is done unconsciously, possibly in part because the child is being taught that the legalistic, strict Heavenly Father is quick to deliver everlasting ~'massive retaliation" for sins, which this individual m a y deem his feelings of anger to be. At this point we have an individual who is unconsciously fearful and angry toward God (upon whom he has displaced fear of and anger toward a parent), and probably upon whom he has projected frightening characteristics that he, correctly or incorrectly, attributed to his natural parent. He may view God as much more demanding and punitive than his own religion presents God as being. If his religion does present God as being very demanding and punitive, that may reinforce his views. If it does not, he may modify his views somewhat but still may cling to them in the face of his church's teaching basically of a loving, forgiving God. If this individual goes into adult life full of unconscious fear and anger toward God (albeit much of it displaced from a natural parent), and viewing God as more demanding and punishing (albeit much of this projected) than giving and forgiving, then he is a set-up for this type of spiritual mourning when misfortunes strike him. The dynamics I have been describing and relating to religious beliefs is drawn from the body of knowledge of psychoanalytic theory. Such dynamics seems to influence a number of descriptions of this type of spiritual mourning, though the originators of such concepts might or might not agree with so mixing or applying them. In any case, such a person as I have described in this type of spiritual mourning is often burdened by a profound sense of guilt. He seems unable to feel that God will (or perhaps even can) alleviate his guilt through God's love and forgiveness. Such an individual m a y not feel he is ever really forgiven, even though he confesses his sins and does penance for them. Not infrequently this is because he is not conscious of what may be his "sin," his unconscious anger toward God. He may erect scrupulous standards for himself. Often that worsens matters for him because he tends to experience these as more demands that a harsh God is making upon him, demands he feels he cannot meet and which, therefore, may increase his guilt and his anger. This is not to say that
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all persons who erect high moral standards for themselves do so on this basis. Many do so on the basis of a deep love for God, as an athlete who loves a sport might exact more and more demands upon himself in training so that he m a y serve and enjoy his sport all the more. But such people do so with genuine z e s t and joy. They are swept along by love and initiative, not driven by anger and fear. The person I am speaking of finds little joy in what he is doing. He is driven, and often morose and gloomy in his efforts. However, it is possible such individuals also may return to a closeness with God. In so doing, they usually experience changes in their self-images and in their image of God also.
Spiritual mourning involving ~'care of vicarious figures" In this form of spiritual mourning there is a denial or repression of one's own grief over loss. One projects onto others what he is feeling for himself, and then cares for them, perceiving them as suffering and wronged individuals. Of course they often are, and this individual may do much good for those others with whom he unconsciously identifies. Again, not everyone who actively cares for others is necessarily operating under the influence of such an unconscious mechanism. If the caring for others is based too much on an unconscious vicarious mechanism, there may be problems if one feels one's own needs are unmet, and the resulting anger may spoil the "milk of h u m a n kindness." In transposing this to the spiritual mourning sphere, there appear to be two possible analogies. One is that the individual who feels abandoned by God m a y project his own grief onto those he perceives (often correctly) as the materially abandoned, i.e., the poor, the underfed. The other possibility is that he m a y project his grief onto those he perceives, correctly or incorrectly, as the spiritually lost. The "spiritually lost" might to him be those of other religions, or no religion, whom he feels he must convert. Once again, this is not to say that all who go out to convert others are operating on this mechanism; nor is this to pass judgment on those who attempt to convert others on the basis of this mechanism. But there are some people who are likely to attempt to convert others to their own religion on this basis. A possible result is that they m a y not simply try to convert others but attempt to dragoon them to the "true" religion.
Spiritual mourning involving denial that God is lost This form of spiritual mourning cannot be based completely on analogy to that form of mourning in which the loved one is permanently lost, e.g., by death. Given that, we can note that there are forms of spiritual mourning in which there is denial of a sense of abandonment by God following a significant loss or significant suffering. A possible form of this has already been discussed. It is important to note that in such forms of spiritual mourning the individual
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consciously believes that he does not feel a sense of abandoment, and this is based on unconscious defense against the feelings that would accompany a sense that God has temporarily abandoned him. (This is one distinguishing aspect between this form of spiritual mourning and the reaction to loss and suffering to be described next.) In the forms of spiritual mourning involving defensive denial of a sense of abandonment, the individual might continue on in his belief in God consciously; but any one of a number of displacements of the yearning and anger of unconscious protest (or perhaps the apathy and disorganization of despair) m a y take place.
Persistence of faith unshaken by loss and suffering This last situation to be described is one in which I feel spiritual mourning does not occur in response to earthly loss and suffering. In this situation there is little if any shaking of faith or of the trusting attachment of the believer to his God, even though the loss or suffering might be severe. This is because in this situation the believer does not experience to any significant degree a sense of separation from God or abandonment by God when he experiences the earthly loss or suffering. This m a y be due to certain beliefs on his part. The last words of Christ as stated in Luke seem to be the watchwords of some believers who experience no feeling of abandonment by God under the impact of suffering: ~Father into Thy hands I commit my spirit. ''18 This does not mean that one cannot try to change temporal affairs for the better by his own efforts; but if one cannot change matters, such people seem to accept what is and to abandon themselves to trust in God. A child usually develops trust on the basis of experiencing over and over that his mother lovingly meets his needs, and possibly also by experiencing that even though she goes away briefly she returns to meet his needs. 19 Those believers who have this kind of faith in God are likely to experience a rather constant trusting attachment to God. Other factors can tend to weaken the effect of this learning. The way one interprets his needs and interprets events influencing his needs is also important; and some who feel quite strongly that their God should provide them earthly happiness may have at times some difficulties with constancy of faith. Nevertheless, even though one or another of these various situations may exist, a strong faith in God might perhaps be developed. Ultimately, however, faith in God does require a sense of acceptance and trust in the mystery that is GOd.
References 1. Freud, S., '~The Future of an Illusion," In The Standard Edition of the Complete Psychological Works of Sigmund Freud, vol. 21, London, Hogarth Press, 1961, pp. 5-56. 2. Erikson, E., Childhood and Society, 2nd ed. New York, W.W. Norton & Co., 1963, p. 250. 3. Bowlby, J., '~Separation Anxiety," Int. J. of Psychoanalysis, 1960, 41, 89-113; ~Grief and
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4. 5. 6. 7.
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Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 1960, 15, 9-52; ~Processes of Mourning," Int. J. of Psychoanalysis, 1961, 42,317-340; "Pathological Mourning and Childhood Mourning," J. Am. Psychoanalytic Assoc., 1963, 11,500-541; Attachment and Loss, vols. 1 and 2. New York, Basic Books, 1973 (By the Tavistock Institute of Human Relations). Matthew 6:11 (RSV). Bowlby, J., '~Grief and Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," op. cit., p. 21. Rebertson, J., Film: ~'A Two Year Old Goes to Hospital." London, Tavistock Child Development Research Unit. New York, New York Univ. Film Library, 1953. Lindemann, E., "Symptomatology and Management of Acute Grief," Am. J. Psychiatry, 1944,
101,141-148. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19.
Mark 15:34 (RSV). Bowlby, J., "Separation Anxiety," op. cit., p. 90. __., ~Separation Anxiety," op. cit., p. 90. ., '~Grief and Mourning in Infancy and Early Childhood," op. cir., p. 23. __., "Processes of Mourning," op. cit., p. 321. ., "Pathological Mourning and Childhood Mourning," op. cit., pp. 246-251. Greene, W.A., "Role of Vicarious Object in the Adaptation to Loss: I. Use of a Vicarious Object as a Means of Adjustment to Separation from a Significant Person," Psychosom. Med., 1958, 20, 344-350. Bowlby, J., Attachment and Lossl vol. 2, Separation, op. cit., p. 246. Mark 15:34 (RSV). Bowlby, J., Attachment and Loss, vol. 2, Separation, op. cit., p. 248. Luke 23:46 (RSV). Mahler, M., "Thoughts about Development and Individuation," Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, 1963, 18,307-324.
