ALISON W ^
!
?:
:
:
:
:
: :
!? ! V:
OTOGRAP
need by families wit f the
child
even more
di
London have formed o enrich t*
^ -
Most
if asked whether
handicapped children better deal than those living living in institutions, would immediately reply 'Yes'. Perhaps because of this, the problems facing the handicapped child and his family living under the same roof can all too easily be swept under the carpet. We forget that parents are often left to cope with a child whose handicap they barely understand; we forget that difficult behaviour can ostracise a family, not only from neighbours but from relatives?little Johnny may not look as though he's handicapped so: 'Why can't he behave like other children?' It was this sort of problem which, in 1970, brought together two families who wanted to do something for their children. Maurice Collins?who has an aphasic daughter?and Eddie Renton?who has two partiallysighted sons?talked about their children's future. Their first move was to hire a nursery in North London and whole families?parents, handicapped children and their brothers and sisters spent Saturdays there. It was, as Maurice says, 'very cramped, but very exciting'. Handicapped children were playing with normal children for the first time; parents were able to relax their vigilance over the children and talk over their problems with people facing similar difficulties. people,
at home were
getting
a
in company is aa social social art art which which Eating Eating in company is
has has to to be be learnt learnt and and
This group was so successful that Maurice and Eddie began looking for bigger premises. After approaching the Harmsworth Foundation they were lucky enough to be offered the use of a kitchen, two recreation rooms and outdoor playspace at Coram Fields? the children's 'centre' near Great Ormond Street. The larger premises meant that more families could join the group and apart from families who heard about the group 'on the grapevine', newspaper articles in the Sunday Times and the Hampstead and Highgate Express drew in other families. The average attendance on any one day is now about 15-20 families. Every other Sunday, after a swim for the more energetic ones, families gather at Coram Fields soon after midday. Everyone has a say as to what they want for lunch and, after noisy prolonged discussion, the shopping party sets out to raid the local shops. Then it's 'all hands on deck' for making salads, cutting up meat and cheese, and buttering the bread. Over protective solicitous parents may never have given their chidren the chance to learn things like this ?but simple domestic skills are necessary if these children are to take their part in the community and be accepted by it. The atmosphere is so happy and practised. practised.
37
38
relaxed that it really doesn't seem to matter if you find yourself eating a cheese and fish paste sandwich! Everyone sits down to lunch at a long table and, although the children can 'get down' when they've finished, the chance to eat together in the company of other families provides another opportunity for useful social training.
As I looked around the table I noticed how many of the children were sitting next to adults other than their parents. The way in which adults and children mix freely is one of the group's greatest benefits. Parents so often tend to 'smother' the handicapped child, attempting to compensate for what their child lacks, but this all-too-natural instinct often results in an
additionally handicapped
young
adult, helpless
and unprepared to take his place in the community, with a social handicap on top of a physical or mental one.
With 30 or or more more children in in the group there is aa birthday For most most of the children the party almost every every week-end. For their best friends so so they want want to is composed of their group group is composed of celebrate with them than at at home. home. them rather than Below which everyBelow Parents help with with the the serving of of food food which had aa hand hand in in preparing. has had body has
In this group, where everyone is accepted and where each person feels a 'member', when a child behaves in a way which is normally considered socially unacceptable, he can be shown, within this tolerant and secure framework, that to 'do it this way' rather than 'that way' is less likely to make him stand out in a crowd. David, for example, is very short-sighted so he comes up very close to you and touches you when speaking. Gradually, within the group, he is being taught that either he must explain his poor sight as the reason for having come very close to people, or he must stand a little further back as people normally do. After the lunch has been cleared away and washed up some of the parents take the children outside for games, giving other parents the chance to talk to each other and to Mary Arkwright and Karen GraefF, who are around most Sundays. Mary, who is a friend of the Collins family, has been with the group since it started and her experience as an educational therapist, plus Karen's experience as a psychologist, have been invaluable to the group, helping them gain fresh insights into their children's behaviour.
During the week the parents meet informally in each other's homes with Karen and Mary; this gives them a chance to swop experiences and, with Karen and Mary, to try and understand more of their children's handicap and how they can best help them. On a practical basis too, Mary can advise the parents on how to cope with unsatisfactory educational/training facilities, lack of satisfactory communication with doctors and hospitals, and the countless other problems facing each parent.
A game of trying to bounce a ball through a group of hoops be fascinating and improve co-ordination at the same
can
time.
For many parents the greatest personal benefit is the increased understanding they have gained of their child's handicap. As one father said: 'Until recently I just didn't understand my daughter; I used to wallop her because I though she was defying me'. Now he spends an hour with her every evening, talking to her, looking at things together?beginning to understand her. When I took someone else along to visit the group one Sunday, his first reaction was?'There doesn't seem to be more than a couple of handicapped children here'. Well?that all depends on what you mean by 'handicapped'. Firstly, many of the children classified as 'handicapped' show no obvious physical signs of handicap. And secondly, many brothers and sisters are placed at a disadvantage by the simple fact of being part of a family with a handicapped member, they are, in fact, 'handicapped' too. They have had to share the family's isolation; they may feel resentful at the apparently greater share of attention and care lavished on their handicapped brother or sister?all of which can lead to more problems in the family. Towards the end of the afternoon everyone comes in
The parents' The parents'
turn to turn to
eat?Maurice Collins, co-founder co-founder of group, is of the the group, is eat?Maurice Collins,
at at
the the top left left of the table. 41
for tea?which seems to be a birthday tea almost every time! With thirty or more children someone nearly always has a birthday that week or next week so a birthday tea, cake and candles are the order of the day. For most of the children this group is where their friends are, so this is why they want to celebrate. Towards six o'clock families start packing up to go, toys are put away, the kitchen cleared and arrangements made for weekly meetings and outings. The activities of the group have, in fact, mushroomed from the fortnightly get-togethers. One of the most successful recent ventures was a Whitsun weekend camp. Spending a day together is one thing, but living absolutely communally on a camp-site throught three days of pouring rain is something else?but it worked. The children had a tremendous time?even if some of the parents felt a little shattered!
A child child who is free of handicap is helped along a 'balancing plank' by other children one of whom (on the right) is only
partially sighted.
? ? A A little little
one of of the the group the helpers?in fact the is boy boy hugs hugs one helpers?in fact group is break break the the boy of his his habit habit of of putting his arms arms boy of putting his around around everybody he meets meets since since itit is is not not 'socially aceverybody he 'socially achas to behaviour although he has to approach ceptable' ceptable' behaviour approach very very although he close to to people to recognise close them because because his his sight so people to recognise them sight isis so
trying trying
to to
poor. poor. A A
'balancing plank' getting heavy
use
in the
playground.
:
igf"
I
jB^SL
alifc^
ukmSmt11
8S3B?
"
X iSmlm
111!
:
t?
i"
pmsiii ? *y
:
?'
-
fc
A Two Two 'If too'. that too', 'If II had do that could do had aa beard II could
the
girls help job.
aa
to get driver to tractor driver very small tractor get the
hang
of
fT
On
some of the children have been smaller scale, some with other families in the group. This stay overnight seem aa small thing, but spending time time away may may seem away from their parents is helping them to to achieve an an emotional but which is secure atmosphere but independence within aa secure not not based based on This This on the needs of the parent. the needs independparent. ence ence is is essential able to to take take essential if to grow if they are are to up able grow up their their place of in society. The ease with which many The ease place in many of these and to the these children to the children and children now now relate to other other children relate to adults to everyadults in benefit to in the the group is of tremendous benefit of tremendous everygroup is one and and one and and gives a relaxed the a relaxed the friendly gives group group aa
to to
atmosphere. atmosphere. The The
group's
was aa most most recent venture was recent venture
'Mobility
in Centre building held at at the the former former Dyslexic Week', held building in Dyslexic Centre and and Coram Coram Fields. of of Fields. Under Under the the guidance Mary guidance the at the ten of of the whole days five whole the children children spent Karen, Karen, ten days at spent five Centre Centre with with aa
Week The Week child. The to each each child. helper helper assigned assigned to the very with the left fairly unstructured with very deliberately deliberately left fairly unstructured broad broad aims aims of and child and of learning each child more about about each learning more some specific each child child overcome overcome some possibly possibly helping specific helping each or into aa shop as not not being to go able to difficulty?such difficulty?such as shop or go into being able cross cross the the road child child road or each It each or use It also also use aa phone. gave gave phone. the the chance in aa chance to time in to spend of time considerable periods spend considerable periods of one-to-one one-to-one relationship adult. with an an adult. relationship with It It is is early assessconcrete assessto attempt early days any concrete days yet yet to attempt any ment ment of of the will will benefits the Week?many benefits the of the of probably probably Week?many
was was
43
Going for ground.
a
quiet
walk among all the bustle of the
play-
number of weeks or even months? training is of immense importance and something which, unfortunately often gets missed out at special schools or training centres. A unique feature of the group is the way it mixes children with all sorts of handicaps; there are partially sighted children, two mongol children, aphasics, children with speech and learning disorders; and with behaviour disorders. It is extremely moving to watch a severely disturbed child unselfishly helping a partially-sighted child to score a goal at football. The group has been so successful, that it seems remarkable that, as far as can be established, no similar group exists. Hopefully the publicity this group has received will spur other parents on to form similar groups. If the handicapped in our society?and the group has shown how blurred the distinctions between 'handicapped' and 'non-handicapped' can become? are not to live among us as second-class citizens they need to learn all the social skills possible in the most natural way possible. Let us not be responsible for placing our own additional burden of handicap on these children. Many children will only be handicapped insofar as we 'handicap' them.
only be
seen over a
but this sort of social
!
?:
:
:
:
:
: :
!? ! V:
OTOGRAP
need by families wit f the
child
even more
di
London have formed o enrich t*
^ -
Most
if asked whether
handicapped children better deal than those living living in institutions, would immediately reply 'Yes'. Perhaps because of this, the problems facing the handicapped child and his family living under the same roof can all too easily be swept under the carpet. We forget that parents are often left to cope with a child whose handicap they barely understand; we forget that difficult behaviour can ostracise a family, not only from neighbours but from relatives?little Johnny may not look as though he's handicapped so: 'Why can't he behave like other children?' It was this sort of problem which, in 1970, brought together two families who wanted to do something for their children. Maurice Collins?who has an aphasic daughter?and Eddie Renton?who has two partiallysighted sons?talked about their children's future. Their first move was to hire a nursery in North London and whole families?parents, handicapped children and their brothers and sisters spent Saturdays there. It was, as Maurice says, 'very cramped, but very exciting'. Handicapped children were playing with normal children for the first time; parents were able to relax their vigilance over the children and talk over their problems with people facing similar difficulties. people,
at home were
getting
a
in company is aa social social art art which which Eating Eating in company is
has has to to be be learnt learnt and and
This group was so successful that Maurice and Eddie began looking for bigger premises. After approaching the Harmsworth Foundation they were lucky enough to be offered the use of a kitchen, two recreation rooms and outdoor playspace at Coram Fields? the children's 'centre' near Great Ormond Street. The larger premises meant that more families could join the group and apart from families who heard about the group 'on the grapevine', newspaper articles in the Sunday Times and the Hampstead and Highgate Express drew in other families. The average attendance on any one day is now about 15-20 families. Every other Sunday, after a swim for the more energetic ones, families gather at Coram Fields soon after midday. Everyone has a say as to what they want for lunch and, after noisy prolonged discussion, the shopping party sets out to raid the local shops. Then it's 'all hands on deck' for making salads, cutting up meat and cheese, and buttering the bread. Over protective solicitous parents may never have given their chidren the chance to learn things like this ?but simple domestic skills are necessary if these children are to take their part in the community and be accepted by it. The atmosphere is so happy and practised. practised.
37
38
relaxed that it really doesn't seem to matter if you find yourself eating a cheese and fish paste sandwich! Everyone sits down to lunch at a long table and, although the children can 'get down' when they've finished, the chance to eat together in the company of other families provides another opportunity for useful social training.
As I looked around the table I noticed how many of the children were sitting next to adults other than their parents. The way in which adults and children mix freely is one of the group's greatest benefits. Parents so often tend to 'smother' the handicapped child, attempting to compensate for what their child lacks, but this all-too-natural instinct often results in an
additionally handicapped
young
adult, helpless
and unprepared to take his place in the community, with a social handicap on top of a physical or mental one.
With 30 or or more more children in in the group there is aa birthday For most most of the children the party almost every every week-end. For their best friends so so they want want to is composed of their group group is composed of celebrate with them than at at home. home. them rather than Below which everyBelow Parents help with with the the serving of of food food which had aa hand hand in in preparing. has had body has
In this group, where everyone is accepted and where each person feels a 'member', when a child behaves in a way which is normally considered socially unacceptable, he can be shown, within this tolerant and secure framework, that to 'do it this way' rather than 'that way' is less likely to make him stand out in a crowd. David, for example, is very short-sighted so he comes up very close to you and touches you when speaking. Gradually, within the group, he is being taught that either he must explain his poor sight as the reason for having come very close to people, or he must stand a little further back as people normally do. After the lunch has been cleared away and washed up some of the parents take the children outside for games, giving other parents the chance to talk to each other and to Mary Arkwright and Karen GraefF, who are around most Sundays. Mary, who is a friend of the Collins family, has been with the group since it started and her experience as an educational therapist, plus Karen's experience as a psychologist, have been invaluable to the group, helping them gain fresh insights into their children's behaviour.
During the week the parents meet informally in each other's homes with Karen and Mary; this gives them a chance to swop experiences and, with Karen and Mary, to try and understand more of their children's handicap and how they can best help them. On a practical basis too, Mary can advise the parents on how to cope with unsatisfactory educational/training facilities, lack of satisfactory communication with doctors and hospitals, and the countless other problems facing each parent.
A game of trying to bounce a ball through a group of hoops be fascinating and improve co-ordination at the same
can
time.
For many parents the greatest personal benefit is the increased understanding they have gained of their child's handicap. As one father said: 'Until recently I just didn't understand my daughter; I used to wallop her because I though she was defying me'. Now he spends an hour with her every evening, talking to her, looking at things together?beginning to understand her. When I took someone else along to visit the group one Sunday, his first reaction was?'There doesn't seem to be more than a couple of handicapped children here'. Well?that all depends on what you mean by 'handicapped'. Firstly, many of the children classified as 'handicapped' show no obvious physical signs of handicap. And secondly, many brothers and sisters are placed at a disadvantage by the simple fact of being part of a family with a handicapped member, they are, in fact, 'handicapped' too. They have had to share the family's isolation; they may feel resentful at the apparently greater share of attention and care lavished on their handicapped brother or sister?all of which can lead to more problems in the family. Towards the end of the afternoon everyone comes in
The parents' The parents'
turn to turn to
eat?Maurice Collins, co-founder co-founder of group, is of the the group, is eat?Maurice Collins,
at at
the the top left left of the table. 41
for tea?which seems to be a birthday tea almost every time! With thirty or more children someone nearly always has a birthday that week or next week so a birthday tea, cake and candles are the order of the day. For most of the children this group is where their friends are, so this is why they want to celebrate. Towards six o'clock families start packing up to go, toys are put away, the kitchen cleared and arrangements made for weekly meetings and outings. The activities of the group have, in fact, mushroomed from the fortnightly get-togethers. One of the most successful recent ventures was a Whitsun weekend camp. Spending a day together is one thing, but living absolutely communally on a camp-site throught three days of pouring rain is something else?but it worked. The children had a tremendous time?even if some of the parents felt a little shattered!
A child child who is free of handicap is helped along a 'balancing plank' by other children one of whom (on the right) is only
partially sighted.
? ? A A little little
one of of the the group the helpers?in fact the is boy boy hugs hugs one helpers?in fact group is break break the the boy of his his habit habit of of putting his arms arms boy of putting his around around everybody he meets meets since since itit is is not not 'socially aceverybody he 'socially achas to behaviour although he has to approach ceptable' ceptable' behaviour approach very very although he close to to people to recognise close them because because his his sight so people to recognise them sight isis so
trying trying
to to
poor. poor. A A
'balancing plank' getting heavy
use
in the
playground.
:
igf"
I
jB^SL
alifc^
ukmSmt11
8S3B?
"
X iSmlm
111!
:
t?
i"
pmsiii ? *y
:
?'
-
fc
A Two Two 'If too'. that too', 'If II had do that could do had aa beard II could
the
girls help job.
aa
to get driver to tractor driver very small tractor get the
hang
of
fT
On
some of the children have been smaller scale, some with other families in the group. This stay overnight seem aa small thing, but spending time time away may may seem away from their parents is helping them to to achieve an an emotional but which is secure atmosphere but independence within aa secure not not based based on This This on the needs of the parent. the needs independparent. ence ence is is essential able to to take take essential if to grow if they are are to up able grow up their their place of in society. The ease with which many The ease place in many of these and to the these children to the children and children now now relate to other other children relate to adults to everyadults in benefit to in the the group is of tremendous benefit of tremendous everygroup is one and and one and and gives a relaxed the a relaxed the friendly gives group group aa
to to
atmosphere. atmosphere. The The
group's
was aa most most recent venture was recent venture
'Mobility
in Centre building held at at the the former former Dyslexic Week', held building in Dyslexic Centre and and Coram Coram Fields. of of Fields. Under Under the the guidance Mary guidance the at the ten of of the whole days five whole the children children spent Karen, Karen, ten days at spent five Centre Centre with with aa
Week The Week child. The to each each child. helper helper assigned assigned to the very with the left fairly unstructured with very deliberately deliberately left fairly unstructured broad broad aims aims of and child and of learning each child more about about each learning more some specific each child child overcome overcome some possibly possibly helping specific helping each or into aa shop as not not being to go able to difficulty?such difficulty?such as shop or go into being able cross cross the the road child child road or each It each or use It also also use aa phone. gave gave phone. the the chance in aa chance to time in to spend of time considerable periods spend considerable periods of one-to-one one-to-one relationship adult. with an an adult. relationship with It It is is early assessconcrete assessto attempt early days any concrete days yet yet to attempt any ment ment of of the will will benefits the Week?many benefits the of the of probably probably Week?many
was was
43
Going for ground.
a
quiet
walk among all the bustle of the
play-
number of weeks or even months? training is of immense importance and something which, unfortunately often gets missed out at special schools or training centres. A unique feature of the group is the way it mixes children with all sorts of handicaps; there are partially sighted children, two mongol children, aphasics, children with speech and learning disorders; and with behaviour disorders. It is extremely moving to watch a severely disturbed child unselfishly helping a partially-sighted child to score a goal at football. The group has been so successful, that it seems remarkable that, as far as can be established, no similar group exists. Hopefully the publicity this group has received will spur other parents on to form similar groups. If the handicapped in our society?and the group has shown how blurred the distinctions between 'handicapped' and 'non-handicapped' can become? are not to live among us as second-class citizens they need to learn all the social skills possible in the most natural way possible. Let us not be responsible for placing our own additional burden of handicap on these children. Many children will only be handicapped insofar as we 'handicap' them.
only be
seen over a
but this sort of social
